» Randomness. Don’t Eat Off The Sidewalk!


Last week I got carded trying to get a library card. A fucking library card.

Q: What’s the opposite of a sausage fest?

A: A clam bake.

I almost accidentally stole $1.50 worth of bricks from Home Depot today. My bad.

Vegan doritos are delicious. That’s one more check in the plus column for ‘Should I Move To Canada?’

Showgirls is my favorite worst movie ever.

I hate it when creepy old men follow me around office supply stores and constantly ask me if I need helping finding anything. I’m going to start carrying a cattle prod. Learn ’em good.

posted: 07 June 9
under: life, lists

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