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VeganMoFo: Clueless

Do you love Paul Rudd like I love Paul Rudd?  He has fantastic taste in movie roles.  For the most part.  Halloween 6 came out the same year as Clueless, i’m just saying.

 

How do we even talk about Clueless?  I feel like trying to describe it is like trying to describe a unicorn sliding down a rainbow while playing a sweet guitar riff.  I also feel like you’ve all seen it so you know, but anyway:  high school!  Rich kids!  Crazy fashions and made up slang!  Finding yourself and realizing that you have depth and a big crush on your ex-stepbrother!  The best soundtrack of any 90’s movie (tied with Empire Records)!

As a teen in the 90’s, I found Clueless totally unrelatable.  I lived in the midwest and dressed (and acted) more like Travis Birkenstock than any of the girls.  Shoes and shopping and parties was not my thing at all, but I was still totally obsessed with the movie and watched it not sporadically.  Because it’s not about being an accurate depiction of teen life, or teaching us a social lesson.  It’s about breaking in your purple clogs.

Beyond the superficial surface, Clueless smartly takes Cher from an almost cartoonish spoiled rich girl to a normal human being.  When the movie is starting and she says, “She’s my friend because we both know what it’s like for people to be jealous of us.” you kind of want to choke her.  And then after a short while you realize that she’s a lot nicer than most popular girls and by the end you want to be her BFF and let her dye your hair in her jet powered bathtub.

The most important thing that Clueless gave us was the sickest burn of all time that I still use, “You’re a virgin who can’t drive.”

If you love cast reunions as much as I do, check out this one:

This movie launched many careers, including Alicia Silverstone, Paul Rudd, Donald Faison, Breckin Meyer, and Jeremy Sisto, and I guess you could say Brittany Murphy if you weren’t a fan of the amazing The Torklesons/Almost Home. Girl was, is, and will always be a star.

Onto the menu!

Entree:  If there was a readily available vegan McMuffin available, I would always be tardy for it.  There are so many ways you can make one, if you want to make your own English Muffins there’s a recipe in Vegan Brunch or the Ezekiel ones are readily available even where I live.  You can make the tofu omelets from the PPK or the fried egg from Betty Goes Vegan,  Top with Upton’s seitan bacon or maybe some Tofurkey slices or just the ‘egg’.  Normally I am down for homemade cheeses but I think in this case it’s some sliced Tofutti/Go Veggie slices or go home (those Daiya slices are awful, sorry).  Be sure to squeeze your VegMuffin while declaring that your buns, they don’t feel nothin’ like steel.

Side:  A plateful of popcorn fries (recipe below) is way better than a handful of popcorn and some bacon and peanut butter m&ms and whatever else is in that quote, and they will go great with your VegMuffin!

Dessert?  Craving an herbal refreshment, you friggin’ pothead?  That’s cool, I support legalizing marijuana and wish that medical marijuana was more widely available.  But in the meantime, make some Chocolate Chip Mint Leaf Icebox Cookies (recipe below) instead. Please don’t drop the entire roll of dough into the oven to impress a guy.

 

And finally the connection to Kevin Bacon from this film is our favorite fashionable vegan herself, Alicia Silverstone.  They were in Beauty Shop together!  Tune in Monday for a new set of movies.

 

Popcorn Fries, from Eat, Drink & Be Vegan, posted with permission by Dreena Burton

2 1/2 T coconut oil

2 1/2-2/34 lb Russet or white potatoes, washed

1/2 t sea salt

1/2-1/2 t ground turmeric (optional, for color)

2-3 T nutritional yeast (the recipe says optional, but in my opinion nooch is always a must)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.  Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.  Cut potatoes (peeling optional) into strips 1/2-in think.  Add coconut oil to baking sheet and place in oven for 2-3 minutes until oil is just melted, then remove from oven and add potatoes, salt and turmeric and carefully toss to combine.  Bake for 60-70 minutes, until potatoes are golden in spots and fully cooked.  If desired, toss in nutritional yeast five minutes before end of baking.

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Chocolate Chip Mint Leaf Icebox Cookies, from Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar, posted with permission by Terry Romero

(As a side note, I want to say that these are some of my favorite cookies ever and a great use of an overactive mint plant, so if you’ve never tried them, please do!)

1/2 cup fresh mint leaves, lightly packed

1/2 cup nonhydrogenated margarine, softened

1/2 cup nonhydrogentated shortening

1 cup plus 2 T sugar

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1/4 cup non-dairy milk

1 2/3 cup all purpose flour

1/3 cup cornstarch

1/4 t salt

1/2 t baking soda

1 cup chocolate chips (lightly chop chips if they are very large, this will make slicing through the dough much easier)

 

1.  Wash the mint leaves and pat them dry with a towel or spin them in a salad spinner.  Remove any stems and with a heavy knife mince the leaves very fine.

2.  In a large bowl, using an electric hand mixer, cream together the margarine, shortening, and sugar until light and fluffy, about three minutes.  Scrape down the sides often.  Beat in the vanilla and mint extracts.  Add non-dairy milk and beat until creamy.  Sift in the flour, cornstarch, salt, and baking soda and mix to form a soft dough.  Using a rubber spatula, fold in the finely chopped mint and chocolate chips.  Dough will be slightly sticky.

3.  Scrape the dough, with a rubber spatula, onto a large sheet of wax paper.  Form a log about 2 inches wide and 12 inches long, taking hold of the ends of the wax paper and gently tugging to create a rounder log of dough.  Wrap and tuck in the ends of the wax paper and chill the dough till very firm, at least 2 hours or overnight.

4.  Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.  Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.  Slice the dough into 1/2 inch thick slices, place them at least 2 inches apart on the sheets (cookies will spread), and bake 12 to 14 minutes till the edges start to brown.  Remove the cookies from the oven and allow them to cook 5 minutes before carefully lifting them with a spatula onto wire racks to cool.  Store in a loosely covered container.

 

 

posted: 13 September 7
under: recipes, veganmofo

  • Sophia Magnone

    rollin’ with the homies!

  • She got an ass like the back of a bus, cuz.

  • Yes! It’s been way too long since I’ve seen Clueless! I’ve always wanted to try baking a roll of cookie dough and sometimes I will randomly think to myself “do you like billie holiday?” “i love him” and crack up. Also Dan Hedaya will always be “the dad from clueless”

  • Shit, I forgot to make a joke about not dropping the whole roll into the oven and that’s part of the reason I picked the cookies! *edit*

  • Mo

    This. Is. My. Favorite. Movie. Ever. No joke. Last Wednesday, I wrote a short film analysis on it for my film class.

    Seriously, Katie! This has made my freaking day! I love it! Plus, I hadn’t seen that reunion piece before. So great!!!

  • Amy T

    This was my favourite movie as a teenager and I couldn’t relate to it at all! (I also wrote a chapter on it for my honours thesis). AND I watched this last night to avoid the Australian Election depression. Woo!

  • Kelly Dyer

    Now I’m going to watch Clueless again for the millionth time and drive Matt crazy with quoting it. I was obsessed with this movie and the soundtrack… I think I still have that CD somewhere! I remember Shae being really horrified when he saw it at some point, so that means it’s awesome, right?

  • If Shae doesn’t like Rollin’ With My Homies, you need to disown him.

  • veganinbrighton

    Clueless is totally my favourite ever film which makes this my favourite ever of your dinner and a movie posts!

  • I’m not gonna lie – one of my favorite things about having a daughter is knowing I’ll get to watch Clueless and Empire Records and a bunch of self-selected horror movies with her as she grows up. She might be warped, but at least she’ll get all of my inside movie-quote-jokes.

    Oh, did you see Brittany Murphy in Sidewalks of New York? Her storyline is my favorite and I just skip the rest of the movie most of the time.

  • I have not seen that, and I just checked and it’s not on Netflix streaming. 🙁

    I will fully admit that I shouldn’t have been watching at least half of the movies I was allowed to watch (why would you let your small children watch Blazing Saddles if you didn’t want them to start singing ‘I’m Tired’ in the middle of the grocery store, mom?), but I still turned out okay and actually didn’t grow into the foul mouthed asshole I am until after high school.

  • Ha! My parents were clueless about almost everything I watched and read – I picked up The Shining when I was in 5th grade, and that pretty much pushed me in the direction I was sort of already headed regarding movies, books, etc. I lived in freaking IOWA, I needed an outlet! I turned out just fine.

    I’ve always had a pretty foul mouth, and my daughter has picked some of it up – but she knows the important stuff: using curse words appropriately, and who *not* to swear in front of.

  • Wanna hear something funny? My mom rented us those movies! However, if it was at the theater my brother could go see a horror movie but not me. And then one of my brother’s friends loaned him some Stephen King paperbacks and I read IT, one of the short story collections, and something else at the tender age of ten. My mom refused to buy me any Stephen King books so I had to find them at Goodwill or whatever and pay my own quarters. The first time she bought me one of his books was when I was like 19 or 20, for Christmas, and still made a huge deal about it because it was trash.

  • Wanna hear something funny? My mom rented us those movies! However, if
    it was at the theater my brother could go see a horror movie but not
    me. And then one of my brother’s friends loaned him some Stephen King
    paperbacks and I read IT, one of the short story collections, and
    something else at the tender age of ten. My mom refused to buy me any
    Stephen King books so I had to find them at Goodwill or whatever and pay
    my own quarters. The first time she bought me one of his books was
    when I was like 19 or 20, for Christmas, and still made a huge deal
    about it because it was trash.