Oh man, I hate it when I get The Stuff in my eye.

Last year when I was asking for suggestions on what horror movies to do for MoFo, John immediately suggested The Stuff. I had never seen it and it wasn’t available on Netflix at the time, so I couldn’t do it. But now i’ve seen it and here we are!

The Stuff is sticky white substance that some dude discovers coming out of the ground. Naturally, his first instinct is to put it in his mouth and he finds that it’s very sweet. Soon, The Stuff is being marketed as a zero calorie dessert that’s so addictive, it’s putting the ice cream industry out of business! Also it may or may not be a parasitic organism that takes control of the people who eat it. You’ll have to watch to find out!

This movie is delightfully 80′s, has a few funny lines (which may not be intentional), and it’s not particularly scary. It’s definitely a fun movie to watch with a group and good for people who don’t like their horror movies too horror….y.

Starrng Michael Moriarty (the original ADA on Law & Order), Garrett Morris (SNL, 2 Broke Girls), and Paul Sorvino (Goodfellas, also OG Law & Order).

So since it was his idea for me to do this originally, I asked John to help me with the menu.

First, you get yourself a tub of Ricemellow Creme. The Smuckers marshmallow ice cream topping is vegan, if you’re in a pinch. Then grab a spoon and dig in!

Uh, John. I said grab a SPOON. Gross! What is wrong with you?

Oh. Well shit.

(For a serious suggestion, i’d recommend just having a vegan ice cream party! Buy your ice cream or make your own, drown it in Ricemellow, and check out this PPK thread for some topping ideas! There’s also a great article on VegNews full of links about ice cream and related things.)

Many thanks to John for getting goo in his hair and Isa for probably gagging a little while taking the pictures.

Hey hey, it’s double feature Saturday! There are a lot of movies that would basically have the same menu, so why not make a night of it? As we speak, i’m hiding under a blanket on my couch, watching Back to the Future. It’s cold, let’s power through some movies!

Back to the Future and Pleasantville both involve a dude (and in one case, his hussy sister) going back in time to the 50′s. Their similarities in plot end there since Pleasantville’s 1950′s scenes take place in a fictional tv world. While everything that Marty does in Back to the Future alters his future in a bad way (aka accidentally making his mom fall in love with him), the changes that David and Jennifer bring about in Pleasantville are liberating (which of course leads to attempts at oppression). And Pleasantville may not have a Doc Brown, but it does have Don Knotts!

If you’ve never seen Pleasantville, it’s about two siblings (David and Jennifer) who get catapulted into the world of an old tv show from the 50′s, where everything is perfect. It never rains, there are no fires or crime, everyone is happy. Except Jennifer, so she goes about slutting it up with Paul “Fast and Furious” Walker, blows bubbles, teaches her mom about masturbation, and slowly, her actions spread and people and objects slowly turn from black and white to color. Which, of course means that some people get really upset about the changes and try to ban color, and people who are in color are harassed. I think it’s a metaphor or something. The transition from black and white to color is really neat to watch, the movie was actually filmed all in color and then the black and white parts were added digitally. In the end, the lesson is that there is no such thing as the perfect life.

If you haven’t seen Back to the Future, I don’t know what to do with you.

Both movies star a whole slew of famous people who are really good at their jobs. I really like playing ‘Ohhhh that’s ______ from ______!’ which is why I make the list of actors, but there are so many between the two films, just IMDB that shizz.

Both movies heavily feature a diner, so the perfect menu to bring these two films together is, 50′s diner food!

Entree: Now you could go with the obvious burger, but let’s be a tad more creative and make this No Tuna Melt.
Side: You don’t have to make these Baked Potato Fries, but if you do, you have to do the thyme variation for maximum pun-age.
Dessert: You can make the Old Fashioned Creamy Rice Pudding from Vegan Diner, or you could channel Agent Cooper and his favorite diner food, Cherry Pie.

Someone pointed out to me that for Clue I should’ve done something with plums and mustard because, duh (I felt pretty dumb). If you have any suggestions for the movies I post, including specific links, feel free to post them! The more ideas, the merrier.

Although most of my favorite movies do involve blood and boobs, I wanted to do a wide range of movies this year. Fried Green Tomatoes is one of the few ‘chick flicks’ that I like, and I think it’s because it’s not some ridiculous love story where we’re supposed to believe that making out in the rain is romantic or some shit. It’s about friendship, food, and maybe…a little murder. Crap, even my chick flick involves murder. I tried, okay?

Fried Green Tomatoes is set in two time periods, current day (1991) and Alabama in the 1920-40′s. While visiting an old folks home, Evelyn meets Mrs. Threadgoode (Ninny) and they strike up a friendship. Ninny tells Evelyn stories from the 20′s and inspires Evelyn to do something about her unhappy marriage and life. The stories are about a tomboy named Idgie and her relationship with her brother’s fiance, Ruth.

There are good times and bad, wacky hijinks and run-ins with the KKK. Eventually, Idgie and Ruth open The Whistle Stop Cafe together, which is where the title comes from. And since this is a chick movie, there’s some sadness that will make even my black heart cry after the 18th viewing.

One interesting tidbit is that the movie left out the romantic relationship that occurs between Idgie and Ruth in the book. It’s implied that Idgie is a lesbian, but that’s as far as the director took it.

Also, the town my sister-in-law lives in has a street called Towanda and I think it took at least a dozen visits before I got screaming “TOWANDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” out of my system as we drove past. No, I did not ram anyone’s sports car while doing so.

Starring Kathy Bates (The Office, Misery), Jessica Tandy (Driving Miss Daisy, Cocoon), Mary Stuart Masterson (Benny & Joon, Some Kind of Wonderful), and Mary Louise Parker (Weeds, The West Wing).

Let’s get our menu from some awesome southern ladies!

Entree: If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll know why eating Susan’s famous Barbecued Seitan Ribs is worth a chuckle. Heh, cannibalism.
Side 1: I mean…duh.
Side 2: I don’t think they’re are specifically mentioned in the movie, but when you want a green vegetable and you want it southern, you can’t go wrong with collards!
Dessert: While looking up a recipe for a different movie, I found out that there is actually an entire blog dedicated to veganizing recipes from the Whistle Stop Cafe cookbook! I thought this Frozen Fruit Salad looked interesting, if you don’t want to mess with agar you can make a peach cobbler for Ruth’s time spent in Georgia.