VeganMoFo: Can’t Hardly Wait

Today is a special case because we are following all of DuJour over to Can’t Hardly Wait! Breckin Meyer and Donald Faison are in the band at the party, Seth Green plays the best character EVER, and Alex Martin plays the foreign exchange student who is a sex machine. Them all being in both movies isn’t a coincidence, both movies were written and directed by Deborah Kaplan and Harry Elfont.

It’s the last party of their high school career and Preston just found out that his dream girl, Amanda, is newly single. As you can see above, he is dorkily excited about it. He decides he’s going to give her a letter about how he feels at said party, and obviously that doesn’t go smoothly. Also he drags along his best friend who hates everyone and no one even knows her name. But who cares about that crap when we can talk about Kenny Fisher?

This movie is full of high school stereotypes, and Kenny is the rich (look at that SUV) white kid who drops so much street slang that almost everything he says could be a catchphrase. Why is he wearing goggles? Was that ever cool? Anyway, Kenny desperately wants to get laid, and he has a backpack full of sexy things to help, like a Fragrance of Love scented candle, bitch. It’s so ridiculous that it’s cute and i’m not sure if anyone but Seth Green could’ve pulled this role off without looking like a total jackass. Keeping this all in mind is the only thing that got me through the pilot of Dads.

There are other sub-plots, like a group of nerds plotting to embarrass the jerky jock/Amanda’s ex, said jock trying to get his friends to all dump their girlfriends because he’s convinced that girls will be lining up for them at college, Barry Manilow, and a whole lot of stuff that was edited out to get a PG-13 rating/for time.

Mostly starring Ethan Embry (Empire Records, Sweet Home Alabama) and Jennifer Love Hewitt (Party of Five, The Ghost Whisperer). Also a whole bunch of Buffy alum appear! And does anyone else remember that show that ran for one season, Byrds of Paradise, where J-Love and Seth Green played siblings?

This movie came out my senior year, so it’s only natural that I would try to pick out my ‘character’ in the movie. I would’ve been Amber Benson, obviously.

Entree: Anyone order a Loveburger? No? I’m not entirely sure what would be on a Loveburger (no jizz jokes), so just pick any ol’ burger you want to make, Joni has quite a few recipes.

Side: We are gonna get rippppppppppppppppped on watermelon! And by we I mean people who actually drink, us sober assholes could I guess just used raspberry juice.

Dessert: I bet you’re thinking the pot brownies, right? Wrong, those brownies sucked, remember! We are gonna make our own strawberry poptarts/hand pies.